During the summer of 2017, I found myself begging God for answers. Disappointment, exhaustion and the feeling of being genuinely overwhelmed came to a head when it was time for our beach vacation. My agenda for the week included having lots of fun in the sun with my family, but also re reading "Uninvited" by Lysa TerKeurst and preparing for my first Women's Bible Study that would begin one month later.
I decided to take time away from all forms of social media during the week so that I could truly focus on both the Bible Study, but so that I could also devote time to my family. I often retreated to the quite balcony to journal and to spend time with God. I began to demand answers from God. "Why haven't you moved?" "You have all of the power in the Universe to make my life easier and you haven't!" And..."I don't know what you are doing in my life!" The scripture that God repeatedly sent to me during the week was Psalms 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God." I thought over and over... This is not helping right now! And... This isn't really what I want to hear right now.
As the week went on and the fun in the sun continued, I began to become a little more frustrated until Thursday afternoon. Late Thursday afternoon, my husband, children and I were on the beach as people began to take down their umbrella's and head in for the day. Spunky and I sat lazily in our beach chairs watching the ocean and our kids play in the sand beside us. We suddenly noticed 20 people down the beach in lime green t-shirts. Someone was talking loudly, but I could not make out what they were saying and they began to make two vertical lines with an isle in the middle down the beach.
I became curious and got up from my beach chair and made my way closer. An older lady noticed me and waved me over and said "Do you want to come and see?" I couldn't see anything and I said "What exactly am I supposed to be looking at?" And she pointed closer to the water where two baby sea turtles were making their way to the ocean. One of the turtles knew exactly what to do, he pushed through as the waves hit him and continued to edge closer to the ocean with the pound of each wave, seconds later he was in and no longer visible from the sand.
The second sea turtle wasn't as eager to go into the ocean. With each pound of the wave he backed up and seemed scared. The lady in front of me looked at me and said something so powerful that I will never forget it "Sometimes we're just not ready to swim yet!" Her words hit me just as hard as the waves hit the second sea turtle. Seconds later someone came up and scooped up the little sea turtle into safety.
At that moment, I knew exactly why God had not fulfilled my dreams "I'm not ready to swim yet!" I know that God has a plan for me, but He still has work to do in me before He can fulfill His plans for my life. I know that I am not going to be stuck in this place forever and His plan is the perfect plan. No amount of rushing and pushing isn't going to make his plan come sooner.
So until the Lord reveals His plans for me....I will wait.
Seaturtle picture courtesy of http://zenfrogyeah.tumblr.com/post/16967636753
