You Can't Keep A Goodman Down...

My husband is the author of surprises...good and bad!

One of the first surprises that I remember was in November of 2002. 

We had been dating for only a few weeks when he invited me to go to his (ginormous) church to hear a famous pastor, Dr. David Jeremiah.  To be honest, this was apparently a big deal.  However, I had no clue who this famous pastor was.  I had gone to church all of my life, but that was it.  I didn't watch pastor's on tv for fun, I didn't listen to Christian music and I didn't go to church more than I had to.  However, I was totally smitten with my new boyfriend at the time and if he invited me to church, then I was going to be there!

I remember sitting in the passenger seat of his red sports car wearing a purple sweater, grey mini skirt, black tights and mary jane shoes.  Driving up to the church we  were stopped in a traffic jam.  Yes, a traffic jam...going into the church parking lot.  This was something that never happened when I went to my small country church of 100 people on a good day.  We drove up and the church was gigantic!!!  I had never been in a church this huge, I felt like I was the size of an ant walking into the beautiful lobby.  That's when the surprise hit me, when he said "My parents saved us a seat".  I stopped walking, turned my head and said "Your parents??"  "Your parents are here? I've never met your parents."  Just so you know, I wasn't calm, cool and collective and my eyes were probably the size of saucers.  He replied "Oh, well...sorry.  Do you need me to give you a second?"  "Nope.  Not at all, let's do this."  Sounding way more confident than I actually was.

We walked so far down the auditorium, that I was convinced that we were going to be sitting on the front row, when I spotted a middle aged lady with a bobbed haircut, turned around in her chair watching me walk in.  When we made eye contact, she stood and smiled and outstretched her arms to give me a big hug.  (This was definately different than any parental meeting that I had ever endured during my 19 years of life and I had met several of my boyfriends mothers).  Sitting 3 seats down from her was a middle aged man that was slightly bald wearing glasses.  This was Spunky's father, his name was John Goodman (not the famous actor).  Since we were very early to the service, Spunky's Dad proceeded to tell me his entire life story and ask me every detail of my life.  His mother frequently leaned over and told him to shut up, to stop asking me questions and she called him "Margaret" several times.  I had no clue what was going on, or who this Margaret person was(Spunky's grandmother, who loves to get to know people), but this entire situation was making me wish that I had applied more deoderant. 

I got through the evening with grace, but not without an invitation to Thanksgiving dinner and another round of hugs from Spunky's parents.  Little did I know that this man, John Goodman would make a huge impact on my life in such a short period of time.

It turns out, that Spunky's father had a heart condition and actually almost died several years earlier. Through lots and lots of prayer and a miracle he recovered.  However, he still had to follow up with his cardiologist routinely and had to quit working as a football coach, a job he loved.

Even though his life had dramatically changed over the past several years, he was one of the most selfless men that I had ever met.  John spent his days serving others.  He was a huge impact at the church.  He greeted in a red blazer every Sunday morning, counted the offering every Monday morning, went and greeted visitors on Tuesday evenings and was at the church to pray, encourage others and even served food when needed.  When my husband and I were dating, we would frequently volunteer at a Christian coffee house on Friday and Saturday evenings until after midnight.  I lived an hour away from Spunky, but his parents refused to allow me to make the long commute home after our weekend volunteer dates at the coffee house.  So, they allowed me to stay in their home each Friday and Saturday nights.  John was always sure that they had my favorite cereal each Saturday morning!  His last name was Goodman, and he was truly a good man.

Shortly after our engagement, John's health took a turn for the worst.  He began to experience some of the same symptoms that he had in years past.  Spunky and I worried that he may not be around for our wedding in December.  Many people told us that we were getting married too soon, but we knew that we were meant to be together and it was one of John's final wishes to witness his son getting married.  So what, if we were getting married a little early and I was still in school?  We wanted him to be there!

On our wedding day, my now husband dined with his Dad in a local restaurant for one of the very last times.  My husband still cannot go into that restaurant  on Main St without getting misty eyed.  It was there where my husband gifted John a pocket watch and his Dad gave him some final advice before our 6:00 wedding.

As I was getting ready in the church on our wedding day, it was John who came and knocked on the door and handed me a rose from my future husband moments before I walked down the aisle.  I was thrilled that he had made it to our wedding day, but his skin looked thin and grey.  Looking back at the pictures, I'm not sure how he made it through that day and even made sausage balls for the reception!

When we returned from our honeymoon on Christmas Eve, it was obvious that John was starting to fade even more.  Just before Valentines Day, John was admitted to a big hospital in Atlanta and placed on a heart transplant list.  Many of our newlywed weekends were spent traveling to Atlanta on Friday afternoons and staying until Sunday afternoon.  Leaving on Sunday was always challenging because you never knew what was going to happen during the week.  Our cellphones were always charged and on us in case a heart became available and our gas tanks were always full to make the commute if needed.  We spent many nights in a Ronald McDonald house, where my husband would spend all day on Saturday with his Dad and I would sit in the hospital waiting room visiting with his family and (try to) study for my last semester in college.

By Easter, John started to fade more and more.  We drove to Atlanta a couple of times in the middle of the night because we were told that he may pass away. We prayed for a miracle, we prayed for God's will...at times, I didn't even know what to pray for.  However, just before 5AM on April 29, 2004 we received a phone call from Spunky's mom telling us to drive to Atlanta as fast as we could because they were disconnecting John from the machines at 8:00 AM. 

I remember getting dressed as quickly as I could, getting into my grey Nissan Sentra and turning on the hazard lights and driving as fast as I could.  We stayed silent throughout the entire commute until we hit rush hour in Atlanta.  Traffic like i've never seen....6 whole lanes of traffic gridlocked.  I  prayed over and over, "God, you've gotta let us get there in time, you just have to."  I pulled into the first lot that I saw at the big hospital, the valet lot.  We were the tenth or so car in line for the valet station, but I got out of my car threw my keys at some random man and ran as fast as I could to the Cardiac ICU.

We arrived in the waiting room out of breath, but in time.  The doctor had run into traffic as well and was running late that morning.  This is the part of the story where I screwed up....BIG time.  My husband wanted to see his Dad for one last time, but I couldn't do it.  I couldn't go in and see him like that, I didn't want that memory etched into my head.  However, my husband needed me and I waited in the waiting room. 

The days after John's passing are mostly a blur, but I will never forget hearing my husband sob onto my chest when we turned out the lights to go to sleep that night. He howled and ached for his earthly father and there was nothing that I could do to comfort him, except to hold him and pray.  I felt like a kid again (well, I would say that I still was at the age of 20).  I had no clue what to do in this situation.  I went along with everything, I stood beside my husband at the front of our church during the visitation, I held his hand during the graveside and memorial service and I greeted family members that I had never met.  The other thing that I will never forget is the song "I Can Only Imagine" that was sung at the memorial service.  I had heard that song a thousand times before, but it took on new meaning that day.  I still cannot listen to that song without picturing the day that Spunky and his Dad will be reunited in heaven.

Since John's passing, a lot of things have changed. However,   Spunky and I always look at each other during special moments of our children's lives and wonder what their Big Daddy would do if he were here. We sometimes have to take a step back to wipe away a tear coming down our cheek as we remember the man that is missing. However, we yearn to keep his memory alive in our house.  Prior to his death, he wrote a letter to "his grandchildren yet to be born" and in the letter he describes his love for them and to always put Christ first in their lives.  Pictures of John can be found in our home and Addison even has a pillow made from one of John's favorite t-shirts.  During football season, you will see Spunky wear an old coaching sweatshirt that was owned by his Dad.  I love seeing him talk to our kids about his days on the sidelines with his Dad.  Big Daddy may have passed on from this life to the next, but our children know who he is!

I also know that everything happens for a reason and that God still performs miracles.  I know this because shortly after John's passing two people came to know Christ, two people that John spent 20+ years praying for. 

When Spunky's mom was cleaning out some of John's belongings after his passing, she found that while John was home alone and she was teaching school that he wrote poetry & letters to all of his family members.  The following is a poem that he wrote:



Heart Transplant

 

God changed my heart of stone

I was lost and all alone

Transformed, loved and made a new

God's mercy and grace did renew

This heart now stands on the Rock

A part of the Masters flock

 

Lost and seperated far from the throne

May heart did suffer and groan

God transplanted my heart

Praise His name, He gave me a new start

 

Sin tight grip was on this life

O the torment, O the strife

Bound in darkness and blinded to the light

Jesus came and gave me new sight

 

God changed my heart of stone

I was lost and all alone

Transformed, loved and made a new

God's mercy and grace did renew

My heart now stands upon the Rock

A part of the Masters Flock

 

Soft, pliable, tender and receptive

A new heart of flesh became effective

God's work revealed in me

Changed life, changed motives, changed purpose, can't you see

 

New direction, new love, new power

Holy Spirit came in me that hour

Fresh new start and sin washed away

No more to roam or stray

 

God changed my heart of stone

I was lost and all alone

Transformed, loved and made a new

God's mercy and grace did renew

My heart now stands upon the Rock

A part of the Master's flock

 

 I can Only Imagine - Mercy Me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Weekend Recap: A Girl's Weekend & the 6 Roach's

This weekend was spectacular!  The men in my house went to visit my sister, brother in law and nephew's that live  3 hours away!  Addison is going to be in her gymnastics recital soon, so I felt that it would be best if she stayed here with me so that she did not have to miss her gymnastics class on Friday afternoon.  She was (surprisingly) okay with that!!  The thing disappointing about this weekend was that I forgot to take pictures of our adventures!

After dinner on Friday, we met my friend K and her two adorable daughters for ice cream in our little town. I absolutely love this ice cream shop because they make their own home made waffle cones and waffle bowls while you wait and they are absolutely delicious!  The ice cream is also fantastic!!  I try to get a new flavor each time, but I'm stuck on peppermint with a cinnamon waffle cone!  So yummy!!!  Addison is normally very shy around new kids and adults,  but she was surprisingly very chatty to K and her two girls.  I'm starting to think that she is outgrowing her shy phase that has lasted the past few years!

After we got home on Friday night Addison, Coco the dog and  I stayed up late in my room watching Dancing With the Stars from the week prior.  We had a blast commenting on the costumes and critiquing the dances.  The theme from that week was "Disney" and Addison particularly loved the Frozen dance.  All was going well, until 1 AM when Coco started to bark from down stairs.  Coco has only barked ~ 5 times in her entire life, so I was really freaked out especially since Spunky was gone.  I slowly went down stairs to discover that Coco actually wanted me to put her in her crate! We have been brave the past few nights and let her sleep outside her crate in the basement because she has been doing so well, but apparently she loves her crate!  I put her in her crate and didn't hear anything else out of her the rest of the night!

On Saturday, Addison was invited to her friend J's birthday party.  It was such a cute party!  It was J's 10th birthday and it was a tie dye theme!  J's mom had went all out!  Each child was encouraged to bring an item to tie dye and J's mom provided the materials.  A brought a shirt and it looks great!  J's mom had all tie dye treats to eat including tie dye rice krispie treats and a tie dye cake! She also had this amazing punch that was delicious!  I'm convinced that J's mom needs to plan Addison and Finn's birthday parties!  I stayed for the party and talked to my friend Beth and a couple of other mother's, it was a great time for both of us!

 Church on Sunday was fantastic, but it deserves it's own post.  All I can say is that if you are wanting God to answer a prayer request, please do not give up!  We serve an awesome God who wants to answer your prayer request, but great things take time, so please DO NOT stop giving it to him on a daily basis!!

On Sunday evening, our friend's the Roach's came over for dinner.  I always love having them over!  The parent's B and A are amazing people and my two kids adore their four children.  They love to run and laugh in our yard and they all get along amazingly well!  We grilled out hamburgers and hot dogs.  A knows that I love peanut butter and so she brought me a bag of peanut butter m & m's for us to share while we prepared dinner! 

This weekend was a great reminder that God loves me!!  I think back to this time last year, how depressed my husband were about so many situations in our life and I am so thankful that he delivered us from it.  We are so thankful that we are able to serve in an awesome church and that he has provided such amazing friends to have along the way.  I know that God wants us to be happy and I am so thankful that he answered our prayers.

Friday Favorites 4/15/16

Whew!!  I survived another week!  This week has been a doozy!  Why is it that the week of vacation goes by super duper fast, but the first week back to "life" after vacation crawls by??  Something that I will never understand.  However, it has been a good week!  We were blessed with jobs to go to, people that smiled and prayed for us and a beautiful family!  I am also blessed that you have stopped by my little corner of the world to look at my favorite things this week...  Here we go!

Mark Batterson: "If"

I cannot wait to get my hands on this book!  After reading "The Circle Maker" after it was recommended by a pastor at church, this book is the next one on my reading list.  I also follow Mark Batterson on facebook and I love his deep insights and his creativity with the founding of his church in Washington, D.C.

Cute shirt

I remember my cousin's wearing these shirts when I was much much younger, but I had a lot of growing up to do before I could wear them.  I saw this in Old Navy and it brought back many memories.  I know that this shirt isn't "Mom practical", but I'm thinking that it would be perfect when and if we ever get a date night!

Bed

I totally blame "Fixer Upper" for my new desire to make over our master bed room.  I brought my childhood bedroom suite into our marriage and it is the only furniture that I have not replaced yet.  I have searched for the perfect bedroom suite for us and I think that I have decided to go the modern route and get an iron rod bed. 

Mahogany Teakwood

Lastly, my friend at the office, A introduced me to this scent at Bath and Body Works and I am in love.  I can't wait to get some of my very own!


Enjoy your weekend!

xoxo

My Testimony...

All believers, come here and listen,

let me tell you what God did for me.

I called out to him with my mouth,

my tongue shaped the sounds of music.

If I had been cozy with evil,

the Lord would never have listened.

But he most surely did listen,

he came on the double when he heard my prayer.

Blessed be God: he didn't turn a deaf ear,

he stayed with me, loyal in his love.

Psalm 66:16-20 The Message

 

 

 

 

Like many Southern Baptist girls, I probably went to church on my first post hospital outing.  I would imagine that my mama dressed my sister and I in matching "frilly dresses" and those horrible nylon socks with the lace at the top.  Anyway, regardless of what I wore, I was always in church on Sunday morning, Sunday night and Wednesday night.  We even went to church on vacation.

 

 

We were always "supposed" to be in church, our friends were the people that we went to church with, their mamas were our Sunday School teachers and if you missed Vacation Bible School it was a BIG deal!! 

 

 

At the tender age of 7, I was sitting in Children's Church on a Wednesday evening wearing a cotton hunter green two piece outfit with a black Southern bow in my pony tail.  I remeber listening to our pastor's wife teach our lesson on creation.  My mama was in the room with me and I remember at one point crawling in her lap and crying.  I remember telling her that I was "afraid that I was going to die and go to hell".  My mother was of course worried and she encouraged me to speak to our pastor after the service was over.  However, I was terribly shy and the thought of speaking to our pastor scared me.  I went home that night, terrified to fall asleep.  I requested that my mama sit beside my bed that evening until I fell to sleep.  She went over a thousand times that the only way to ensure that I would not go to hell when I died was to ask Jesus into my heart.  She told me that I needed to pray and tell God that I was a sinner and that I wanted him to forgive me of my sins and to ask him to live in my heart. Since I had gone to church since I was only a few days old, I understood this.  However, it was still difficult to do.  I know that many people are probably thinking, but you were only 7 years old...what bad things could you have possibly done at the age of 7?  However, Romans 3:23 says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.  God knows the numbers of all of the hairs on our head and he knows all of our sins as well (even our thoughts).  My mama told me that she could not pray for me, I had to do it for myself.  Just before drifting off to sleep that evening, I prayed and asked Jesus into my heart.

 

 

Growing up, I was always considered a "good kid" (I know that many people made fun of me because I was always a goody too shoes).  I made decent grades, came home when I was supposed to, did what I was supposed to, but I still sinned.  I thought bad thougths, I had a bad attitude and was disrespectful to my parents, I did lots of things that I was ashamed of.  I am sure that in my teenage years that many people would not believe that I was a Christian, because I certainly did not act like one!  However, I still went to church every Sunday and Wednesday.  My parents were even my youth group leaders.

 

 

However, even though I went to church regularly.  I still lacked having a relationship with God.  I hardly ever opened my Bible except on Sunday mornings.  I remember dazing off during worship services at my church. The only time that I prayed was when a boy crushed my heart or before report card day! 

 

 

After I married Spunky, I was impressed (and a little shocked) by the way that he lived his personal life.  We did not live together prior to getting married, so I was shocked when I saw the time that he devoted to his relationship with God.  Especially when I noticed on our honeymoon that he had an entire duffle bag devoted to different Bible's, journals and devotionals in it (totally not kidding)!  On the opposite side, I feel that he was shocked when he saw that I did not even bring a Bible on the trip!

 

 

Through that, it was also inspiring to see that when hard times came, Spunky handeled each situation with ease and I was always ready to "fly off of the handle".  When big bills came in our mailbox that first year, I would run into our guest bedroom and sob, Spunky however would come in, rub my back and explain that God would provide the funds needed to pay the bill.  He encouraged me to pray about the bill or the situation and to watch and see God working.  I'm not going to lie...for years, I thought that he was crazy!!  However, he was right...God always provided!

 

In 2005 after my miscarriage, I began to question if I was really saved.  I desperately wanted to ensure that I would meet the baby that I lost in heaven.  I heard a pastor say something along the lines that if you are truly saved that you will turn from your sin.  Again, I did most of my sinning during my teenage years.  However, I also knew that I could not lose my salvation (John 10:27-30).

 

On a 3 day religious retreat in 2005, I went to the altar on a Sunday evening and asked God again to please forgive me of all of my sins and that I wanted to ensure that I would have a place in heaven. For weeks prior to the retreat, I would wake up scared that I was not saved.  I went over it again and again in my head, I just did not have peace about my salvation. I spoke to a sweet pastor for a long time and she sat and hugged me for a long time as I cried on her shoulder.  I have not seen her since that evening, but I cannot wait to see her in heaven if I do not see her on Earth again.

 

After that 3 day religious retreat my relationship with God began to thrive.  I started to read my Bible more, and I could see God slowly changing my life and my heart.  This change definately did not occur over night.  It took time, lots of time!  It took Spunky and several other close friends to pray for me and to mentour me.  I am so thankful for one sweet friend who met me at the track each evening to encourage me and help me through difficult times.  I found that I have learned the most about God when I am in the difficult seasons of life, when all the hope that I have is in God.

 

Is this Christian walk easy?  NO!!  It's not!!  I feel that I have been through many situations in my life that I want to just throw in the towel.  However, living with Jesus gives me a hope for the future and he makes my life peaceful.  Is it worth it??  Yes!  It is!! Heaven is worth it! 

 

 

What no eye has seen

 

what no ear has heard,

 

and what no human mind has conceived

 

the things that God has prepared for those who love him.

 

I Corinthians 2:9

 

Please know friends, that I desperately want you to spend eternity in heaven with me. If you have any questions, please feel free to email me at imaginehisblessings@yahoo.com

 



Weekend Recap

This weekend was clearly uneventful compared to last weekend.  Last weekend we were on the beach in beautiful, warm sunny FL.  This weekend we were back home, dressed in jeans and sweaters with 458 loads of laundry to do.  But such is life...

On Friday night I cooked an amazzziing dinner (if I do say so myself).  It was so good that my little people asked for seconds (which never ever happens).  Country style steak with gravy, home made mac n cheese, home made biscuits, apple sauce, green beans and mashed potatoes.  It was heavenly.  It was so good that when I saw our pup Coco eating scraps out of the trash can I didn't immediately stop her because I thought "this is probably the best food that you've ever eaten." Spunky didn't see it that way...

Especially the next morning when we woke up to a awful, horrible, the worst smell that I've ever smelled coming from the basement and discovered that Coco had well....you know in her doggie pen.  I then knew that I married a fantastic man because he didn't even suggest that I clean out the doggie pen and just went and did it anyway.  I then called Pet Smart (and I may or may have not told them that our pup was slathered in doggie poo) & I was thrilled when they told me that they could work Coco in at 9AM and that she would be there for ~ 5 hours for her doggie spa treatment.  I was thrilled that I would be down one child for the day and I had big plans to complete all 458 loads of laundry.

2 hours later I was dressed, hair straightened, make up on and on my second load of laundry when I heard my phone ring.  On the other end of the line was a lady with a British accent (unfortunately it was not Princess Kate or the Queen of England like I had hoped).  This lady was frantically telling me that I needed to pick up Coco instantly because she was sick.  I just knew that I should have let this call go to voice mail....  Anyway, Spunky had ventured to the city after he had dropped Coco off and he had driven his truck.  My Dad also had a truck and while I knew that he wouldn't be happy about this favor that I was about to ask him to do, I had hoped that I could make it up to him by batting my eyelashes like I had growing up.  Unfortunately, he was far away from home as well.  Ugh!  So, I loaded Addison and Finn in my car and they proceeded to ask me 865 questions about why I was putting trash bags all over every inch of my VW sedan? Where exactly Coco was going to sit? Where Addison was supposed to sit? why Finn still had to ride in a car seat?  How old Addison was going to be when she could ride in the front seat? How many days, years, hours, minutes and seconds that would exactly be?  What the weather forecast would be this week?  What would be served in the school cafeteria this week?  And if I pretended to tune them out, they got louder and Louder and LOUDER and eventually Finn would erupt in a loud shriek!

I finally made it to Pet Smart with my little people and they touched every single dog and cat that was shopping in Pet Smart. I was greeted by a poor lady at the desk who looked like Coco had put through the ringer.  She instructed me to pay for Coco's grooming service and then to come and get her (I was thinking, if you say so....you're the one stuck with her while I get in the longest line possible to pay).  I paid for her grooming service at the precise moment that Coco had just finished going #2 in the middle of the grooming salon (oops!). 

I then instructed Finn to hold Addison's hand and for them to follow behind me since I had the strongest Chocolate Lab on the face of the earth to walk to the car.  They both told me that they didn't want to hold hands and that they both wanted to hold Coco's leash.  After a quick "mom look", they decided to hold hands and we all made it to the car.  Thankfully, Coco didn't poo in my car on the way home and she only tried to sit in my lap 4 times on the 5 minute commute.

Spunky came home that afternoon and he was not ammused by my story of picking Coco up at PetSmart and he seemed to mumble something about me being "overdramatic".

Saturday evening was spent eating left overs (Coco had none) and venturing to Michael's to purchase Addison's first set of Shopkins (which resembles erasers that could be purchased in  a gumball machine in 1990).  Anyway, they made her happy and she spent 45 minutes that evening packing them in a Shopkins suitcase to take to church on Sunday.

Church on Sunday was ammaazzing!!  Even though I had to sit alone because Spunky had to help with children's ministry during the first service and I had to assist with Finn's class during second service.  I was quite proud of myself because
1. I sat by myself during the entire service
and...
2. I actually didn't cry during the music or the sermon (which never happens)
     Until....
the last 5 minutes of the service when our campus pastor stood up and was talking about some special things that would take place next Sunday and I started to bawl like a baby! 

I love my pastor, I love my church and I love that my family and I have been called to this church!  I never leave our church feeling unwanted, unloved or unneeded.  I always leave church feeling refreshed and more in love with Christ.

The rest of Sunday was spent taking my Sunday afternoon nap and finishing up almost all of my vacation laundry! I cooked my husband's favorite dinner and I organized everything for this week.  Hoping that this week will be more productive and that we will have more opportunities to serve Christ and others!

More Than A Ring...

A little over 13 years ago, I witnessed my then boyfriend bend down on one knee in the middle of his living room floor and ask me to spend the rest of my life with him.  I had an idea that it was coming as I went to try on rings a few months prior.  I knew that we were supposed to be together forever, even though we had only dated a few months.  He made me happy.  He treated me like a princes.  However, most of all he put his relationship with God before anything...including me.

I squealed "Yes"!  And I gazed at my ring, he apologized instantly that he wished that it could have been bigger, shinier...etc. Spunky had just put his life savings into what would be our first home and I was only 19 and a full time college student. I of course didn't care what the ring looked like, I was thrilled to spend the rest of my life with someone who loved me for me.  "Spunky" promised that one day he would place a bigger ring on my finger.

My half carat engagement ring and I have been through many moments together.  I remember twisting the ring around my finger after we were married and we found ourselves in the ICU waiting room on that April morning while we waited for the doctors to turn the machines off as my father in law slipped from this world into the gates of heaven.  We had only been married for a little over 4 months and I was saddened that my father in law would not be around for my husband any longer.  I knew that my husband still needed his earthly father and I desired for this wonderful, loving man to meet the children that we would have one day.

Months later, we searched for my engagement ring in our gravel drive way as I threw it at my husband after one of our arguments.  Being a newly wed was difficult, especially with the added weight of losing a parent.  I still remember holding my breath when Spunky found it and placed it back on my finger.  I promised to never throw my ring at him again.

A couple years later I was shocked to see two pink lines on the pregnancy test in the bathroom.  So many emotions rushed through my head!  I was thrilled, but felt so unprepared to be a mother at 22!  I wanted to further my education, purchase a bigger home and do so much more before having a baby.  However, I knew that this baby was gift from God and I instantly fell in love with this baby.  Spunky was thrilled!  He had not been this happy since losing his father, especially since this baby was a total surprise!  We were crushed the day that we went to the doctor and we heard the sad news that we had lost the baby.  Spunky held my left hand as I got off the table and kissed my engagement ring.

Thankfully, God gives and takes away.  We were pregnant again 6 months later.  One hot August day, I was overly pregnant and my entire body was swollen.  My fingers were so swollen and I could not remove my engagement ring or wedding band on a Monday morning.  I went on to work and hoped that the swelling would eventually go down.  However, quite the opposite happened.  By noon, my ring finger was purple.  I had to get the ring off!  I had no other choice, but to find a jeweler to cut the ring off.  I rushed to the mall on my lunch break and found only one jewelry store who could cut the ring off...for a charge of $25.  I paid the jeweler and tears ran down my face as he began to cut the ring off.  He stopped, mid cut and said "I don't know what you're crying over, it's just a ring".  I silently let him cut the ring off, gathered the broken pieces of my ring and said "It's more than a ring to me, this ring resembeles the love that my husband has for me" and I walked out of the store.  I was thrilled to have the ring repaired after I gave birth to our 9 days over due healthy baby girl.

A couple of months ago, I took Spunky's wedding band to another jeweler to be repaired after he smashed his hand in a machine at work, causing his ring to be dented in the middle.  As I spoke to the jeweler she noticed that my eyes constantly glanced down at the beautiful Neal Lane engagement rings.  I told her that my husband promised to buy me a bigger engagement ring 13 years ago.  She looked at my ring and told me that my diamond had faded, my band was starting to tarnish and told me not to worry that the store offered a trade in program.  I stuttered "You mean, trade in my ring?"  She replied "Oh yes, we can melt down your ring and you can get a much prettier one".  I had no idea what to say, but I looked down at my half carat engagement ring and I knew in that very moment that I never wanted another ring.  In that moment, I realized that my tarnished, faded half carat engagement ring was prettier than any ring in that store.  I politely thanked the jeweler for her time and told her that I was no longer interested in another ring.

I am thankful that I married the man who gave me the half carat engagement ring, becauase we have the marriage of my dreams!