What this adds up to, then, is this: no more lies, no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth. In Christ's body, we're all connected.
Ephesians 4:25
This is probably the first year in over ten years that I did not send Christmas cards out. I had good intentions of doing it. I even designed our cards and had them printed. However, when it came down to sitting down to addressing them, it did not happen. Needless to say, if you sent us a Christmas card, we truly appreciate it. We display them on the side of the pantry, near our Christmas tree. I love gazing at them as we eat dinner every night.
I especially love the Christmas cards that have a family letter attached. It is often a high - light reel of your year, I get it. I often times feel like our Facebook pages and Instagram profiles are a nice high - light reel as well. I'm guilty too. However, taking this Christmas card photo was nothing short of a disaster. First of all, no one wanted to do it...except me. I couldn't find the time (or the extra dough) to fit in a nice photography shoot for the card. So, a family friend stopped by. Again, no one wanted to do it. Finn wanted his shirt off. Addison was complaining that she was freezing and that the fence was hurting her feet (we did a couple of shots not on the fence and she wasn't looking at the camera in any of those). Spunky was cold and he didn't like his shirt, he was also unhappy because the ground was wet and it was seeping into his converse. And Penelope....yeah, she doesn't like looking at the camera either. I explained to our friend to please make "kissy noises" and she will look, but obviously they didn't listen to me. So...out of 20 pictures, this is the best one.
Life in 2019 has been miraculous and heartbreaking all at the same time.
Addison and Finn are loving school, love extra circulars and church activities. They love each other and they also love arguing over the remote control and other electronics.
We have seen Addison make great strides with her Auditory Processing Disorder, diagnosed in Elementary School. I actually got weepy in church today as I heard her read scripture aloud from a microphone. It may not be much of an accomplishment for many, but this is HUGE for Addison. We have seen her self confidence begin to skyrocket since joining Voices in the Laurel. She is still quite the introvert, but she is happily content going to the beat of her own drum. She has lots of friends when she wants them, but she generally loves not being around a lot of drama. She dislikes make up , dressing up and anything girly. However, she loves all things sparkles and holy jeans (like her mother). She still aspires to become a Pastry Chef and to own her own bakery in Clemson, SC.
Finn loves school, most days. His love for homework from Kindergarten has faded and it is a nightly battle. He does well in school and he is very much the extravert. He has lots of friends and his favorite school activity is "chasing the girls" on the playground. He is mischievous, funny and quick witted. He very much has the personality of his mother. He also sings with Voices in the Laurel, but his favorite activity is playing basketball. He is a hard worker too, and he has loved learning how to use our leaf blower this year. He always demands to "look cool" wherever he goes and especially loves athletic clothes and all things orange, but not Clemson orange. He continues to pull for the Tennessee Volunteers and especially loves watching football.
Penelope the Australian Labradoodle continues to be the love of the family. We fight for her affection, even though Addison is her favorite human. She spends her days playing with her toys and stealing small stuffed animals from the kids rooms. She occasionally travels with me to the office for the day, but she can always be seen at the top of the couch looking out the window for us to come home if she is home alone. We love her dearly and she is very much the Princess of the home!
The biggest miracle from 2019 was the answered prayer of me quitting Dentistry after 15 years. I said goodbye to dental floss and scrubs on July 3rd and I said hello to working for our church plant (Haywood Community Church) and to a non profit children's choir called, Voices in the Laurel. I also added on my first marketing account in late October. 90% of the time I love my work life. However, I do have some very stressful days. In recent days, I have not stopped working until 1-2 AM (possibly why my Christmas cards never went out?). This season has been good, but also challenging finding my "new normal". Nonetheless, I love the opportunity to take my children to school, pick them up from school and participate in all of the school activities. I love the opportunity that I have to lead a Women's Bible Study on Thursday mornings at a local coffee shop and the availability that I have had to meet with women one on one.
Josh, or "Spunky" as many call him is such a supportive and loving husband. The rock of our family . My biggest cheerleader and the one who always encourages me to go after my dreams. He was the first one to encourage me to take the "leap of faith" and to quit my job. He encouraged me to be more available for our children who are growing so quickly. We feel blessed for all of the opportunities that "Spunky" has had to minister this year and for the blessing of landscaping jobs to help us make ends meet. This year, he has been dealing with some physical pain as we are quickly realizing that all of the years and demands of landscaping are taking toll on his body. We had a scare during the summer when a doctor told us that he could have Rheumatoid Arthritis, we were thankful when the test came back as negative. He has dreams of continuing on with Ministry and he has a heart for the people within our church and Western North Carolina. We are not sure what those next steps are looking like and sometimes that leaves us anxious. We know that he is called into Ministry, I know that God has a great plan in store for him. However, this season of waiting has been frustrating, but we are concentrating on what is unseen and not what is seen.
We recently landed in a counselor's office. The stress of the season of Ministry and the drastic life change of my career change has taken a toll on us. We are NOT on the verge of Divorce. This season of Ministry has taken so much. It has taken our time, emotional energy and to some degree, some friendships. I heard a quote a few months back that said "The closer you get to the cross, the fewer people will be around you." I believe that quote to be true. I feel that we are doing the work of God, but the heartache of this season in Ministry has been well...heartbreaking. I see the vision of our church plant, we still have a huge heart for it. However, hanging onto that vision has been tough at times, especially in the dark. It is tough to go through such a touch season...alone. It is tough when you have exposed the rawness of your heart and to no longer have those people by your side. However, it has made me more thankful for the people who have remained our friends through this dark chapter, and for the new friendships that have prospered. Nonetheless, we are in counseling to help us to communicate more effectively and work out some of the hurt that we have experienced over the past 2 years.
I recently spoke to a friend who I haven been friends with for so many years, I said "I feel like I've been on a roller coaster ride" for the past two years and she said "well...you have been." I appreciated her saying that more than she could have ever known. To me, it validated my thoughts and it made me realize that maybe...just maybe I'm not crazy. Do I know what the future holds for us? No. However, I do know that our future is held by the one who aligns the stars every single night and in that, I put my trust in him.
Merry Christmas.....may you be transparent with the ones around your table this Christmas!
"Your transparency will lead to other people's transformation." - Trent Shelton
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